Wild Mother

06/17/2026

Finally hung some curtains. Did you know they make rods that just stick, and no drilling! Me either. Brilliant.

Story time!

Ten years ago, if I met a man who told me we were soulmates, twin flames, or that the universe had brought us together for a reason I probably would have believed him. Heck I was wanting that to fall into my lap! I’m a romantic and a dreamer.

Back then, I was deeply immersed in spirituality. I believed in signs, synchronicities, energy, and divine timing. I also seemed to attract people who spoke that same language. Whether they genuinely believed it or whether they were mirroring me, I don’t know.

What I do know is that I wasn’t just attracting certain personalities. My own childhood wounds made me receptive to them. That’s not victimhood, that’s simply the reality of how our nervous systems work until we begin healing. And I wanted love. So badly. To be chosen. I’m sorry but it’s true. I’ve spent years trying to understand those patterns. Therapy, every book, writing, and sitting with uncomfortable truths in uncomfortable rooms. Trying to learn to trust my body instead of just my heart.

At this age I have a few conclusions. If someone now tells me that the universe brought us together, that they’re manifesting me, or that they already know we’re meant to be together, my body doesn’t melt anymore. It panics. Full on panics.

Ten years ago I heard romance, today I hear urgency. What do you mean you think our paths brought us here together? Like maybe but not because we are some destined couple who rides off into the sunset.

Of course there’s still a small part of me that wants to believe someone could love me that deeply. I think that’s human, but I’ve learned that real love doesn’t need to convince you it was written in the stars after barely knowing you. It doesn’t tell you how good of a guy they are, or that you are their only one ( is this a generational thing, a trend in the dating scene) - what is this?

It unfolds, naturally. I think

The hardest part hasn’t actually been recognizing the rhat setting feels off. I’m getting much better at that.
The hardest part has been what sometimes happens after I set a boundary. When someone reacts with anger, blame, insults, or tries to tear down your character because you said no sorry this isn’t for me. it confirms exactly why that boundary was needed. No means no, isn’t always sexual. It can be no, I’ve changed my mind and this doesn’t feel right to me.

So for now, I think I’m choosing myself. Not because I’ve closed my heart, but because I’ve finally learned that protecting my peace is an act of love, too. I’m moving through a separation, a divorce, selling a home, closing a business, and rebuilding my life from the ground up. I don’t have the energy to force dating or convince myself I should be more open to someone because they tell me it’s meant to be.

The truth is, I’m actually really enjoying my own company.

Tonight I hung some curtains and I really like them and how much warmer the living room feels and cozy

And I wanna hear from men too. Are you experiencing this with women?

🤎

Love Kelly Mae

Wild Mother

06/17/2026

Time for a cat 🐱

06/17/2026

06/16/2026

Sitting on my coffee break at work, casually looking at double wides and trailer parks online, cuz honestly? It’s looking more and more appealing.

These days, I’m not dreaming about more space, more stuff, or more to take care of. I’m dreaming about simplicity. A small place that’s mine, a manageable mortgage, a little garden, a porch to drink my coffee on, and enough room for the people I love.

The younger version of me probably wouldn’t understand it. But this version of me, the one who’s lived a little more life,knows that peace ☮️ is priceless.

Anyone else finding themselves unexpectedly drawn to trailer park listings these days? Haha

I mean Sammy Kershaw knew where it was at

🎶 “She’s the queen of my double wide trailer,
With the polyester curtains and the redwood deck” 🎶

I think I could make one super cute!!!

06/16/2026

You know who is going through a lot right now?

Everyone.

The woman smiling at the grocery store, the man sitting alone in his truck, the teenager pretending they’re fine and the single parent trying to hold everything together while remembering who they are underneath all the responsibility.

Love Kelly Mae

Wild Mother

06/16/2026

🩷

06/15/2026

7 months ago today I packed all of our belongings into 3 trucks. I was scared, emotional, and exhausted. Not to compare something like this to a death of a human, but my grief was undeniable and heavy.

When I found the farm in 2014 I was a young and a little wild soul, who felt invincible. Impulsive and filled with the fumes of daydreams.

My son was 5. I was learning so much. I had big big dreams. And the farm felt so expansive. I wasn’t grounded. But the farm was. It somehow kept me from floating away.

A year in, I received a call as I was standing at my barn board kitchen island built from scraps around the farm, wearing my worn overalls with splatters of paint. It was my mom. Her voice was trembling, and somehow before the words left her mouth, I knew. Kelly Mae, you dad is gone.

I had been grieving him most of my life, but this took the breath right from my lungs. The awareness of mortality hitting me deep in my chest, and all of my daughter issues exposed like a nerve.

The next couple of years when my son was with his dad I was riding around in trucks, backroads, getting muddy, and spending my weekends blurry. I tried to run from myself. During the work week and when my son was home, we had our routines, homework, soccer, and gentle bedtimes. Then my free weekend would come and it would start all over.

I slowly found my grounding, and figured out that life was too fast. I began focusing on bringing the farm back to life. Vegetables, chickens, and eventually flowers.

In 2018 I birthed my daughter at the farm as a single mom. Now twice over. Feeling powerful and strong and ashamed of my story. The details matter less and less of how this happened, and I don’t spend a lot of time visiting the pain of this. It happened how it did, and again I learned so very much.

This is when I really started to take the wild in me, and spin it into beauty. It feels like just as I was finding myself, the world stopped again. Literally. The world shut down, and my mom was diagnosed with a fatal disease.

The farm held me. It held all of us.

I tell this story, as it weaves the heaviness I felt driving away that day. I wasn’t just leaving a farm, I was leaving a place that held me in my hardest moments of life.

And now we are here. I can smell the sweet River air. There is a lightness. It’s cozy, and simple. It’s a place to finally put the pain down, and let go. To stop just trying to survive, but to say ok, we are here now and that was all really hard, but we made it.

I leave out so much. It’s just not worth it. I don’t need to share anything more than the way that I do. I feel like it’s all there somehow, even if it’s not.

Does that make sense?

Love Kelly Mae